Tag Archives: judgmental

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Being Judgmental is Hazardous

We’ve been talking about the whats and whys of being judgmental. Today, we want to share a few of the hazards that I have seen in myself as well as those I coach. See if you recognize any of them!  I am confident you can avoid these hazards and become a positive curious individual who will overcome your critical spirit.

7 Hazards of Being Judgmental / Critical
•    Kills your curiosity
•    Drains your energy and motivation
•    Suffocates your creativity
•    Robs your joy
•    Increases depression
•    Strains key relationships
•    Limits your growth potential

Through our entire judgmental series, I have talked about being open-minded and curious that you may not be right. Now am I saying not to have strong convictions? Absolutely not. Never compromise your beliefs. Stand firm in what you believe. What makes you such an amazing person is your convictions and beliefs. I ask my clients to never compromise their values and to increase in their confidence — but to make sure it is a humble confidence where curiosity allows for openness.

A better path is to be open and curious, first to the relationship that is before you, next to the fact that you may not have the entire story, and finally that the openness will lead you be a stronger, not weaker, individual. You are free to explore where the other person is coming from, without being threatened by it. If in the end there is truth in the other person’s position and it changes you, then you are the better for it!

Let me know if you want to get stronger in this area! I deal with this all the time!

Your Coach,

sig_shandel

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Motivating a Judgmental Attitude

The brain naturally gravitates toward the negative. We have been talking about the perils of a judgmental attitude and how it is a cancer in relationships. Every working person knows how it wreaks havoc in the workplace and sends everyone home in a bad mood. As leaders we need to train people to think differently and arm them with tools to think positively and appreciate diversity of thought.

In our leadership development workshops, the most helpful tool we have is the Personal Motivation and Engagement assessment. Have you taken it yet? If not, talk to me!

We use this to identify a person’s top six motivators, which are made up of one’s beliefs, attitudes and values.

Your top two motivators are what get you out of bed in the morning, excited to take action on something that brings you joy — like making money, learning something new, helping a person in need, or making an impact on a large scale. The top two motivators are what we use to think positively, to move toward things we value.

Conversely, our bottom motivators may cause us to be judgmental and to be trapped in our own negative world of criticism. If we are not aware of what motivates us and equally what “de-motivates” us, we are in danger of criticizing others when they think and behave differently than we do.

Awareness of what our motivators and values are helps us avoid judging others. Instead we learn to accept that people think differently than and are motivated differently than we are. Thus it shields us from the hazards of being a critical person.

But if that awareness doesn’t happen, having a judgmental, critical spirit leads you to be controlling of others.

This is based in fear. You see, if your story is that you are right and you are the expert, then you automatically limit your growth to learn and evolve as a person. People learn and grow from their mistakes of judgment.

If you are always right and never wrong, you are probably a very small thinker who believes you are the smartest person in the room. This often leads to an unprofitable business, a depressed life, and an unhappy marriage full of blind spots and joy killers.

If any of this even remotely describes your situation, we need to talk!

Your Coach,

sig_shandel