One thing I wish I would have discovered earlier in life is that fullness of life requires greater and greater amounts of vulnerability. In my journey, I have learned that my vulnerability has a lot to do with receiving from others. I am a giver by nature and I hope to always be a generous giving person. However, what I have discovered is that giving is the easy thing to do, it is safe, and it does not expose me. Receiving, on the other hand, is something I am learning to do. I have to admit it still isn’t easy, because it makes me feel well…vulnerable.
Vulnerable to someone feeling I am taking advantage of them. Vulnerable to the guilt of asking too much. Vulnerable to taking too much and being seen as selfish. It is all ridiculous and truly it is prideful and disgusting. I think it is a deep seeded fear of rejection and I am sure a host of other fears. The lie I operate from is “I can do it all,” I want to be independent <and not need others. Yet I crave and need the connection that only comes from a community of give and take relationships.
The truth is we need others and it is a giving thing to do to let others help and support us. This allows them to be the giver and they have the opportunity to feel awesome because they helped the giver. Its all so twisted. AND YET as I encourage all of you – I am getting faster to asking for help and for accepting the amazing gifts and talents of those around me.
Today was a victorious day of receiving from so many talented people. I had fun. I worked hard, got stuff done, and enjoyed being me. Why? Because other people invested in me. They helped me. They gave their time and their talent to me and I received it.
Julie is a serious hair master and went the extra mile so the LEXI promo video would be awesome.
Wendy used her 20 years of industry talent and coached me as we shot the video. She made me relax and when I started being corporate – said, “Hey, where did Shandel go?”
Mike generously provided us space to shoot and took us on a tour to find perfect setting.
Loretta jumped in when it looked like a vendor wasn’t going to show up.
Tonight, Kristine will watch “Once Upon A Time” with me and manage the remote so I can multitask.
I am full and I am happy because I humbled myself, I opened myself, and I cared enough about myself to receive the help I needed today. If only, I was more evolved that this was easy…simple, yes, but not easy. You will see me be more vulnerable and ask for more help. But for today, I was satisfied, grateful, and blessed.
Who do you need to ask to help you today?